Day one

Sitting down to this properly tonight.

So. First one done. I had been carrying the box around the house for four days like it was something I had borrowed and needed to give back, and in the end I did it standing up in the kitchen with the radio on.

Wrote her first entry at 04:40.

Day one. I am writing this partly because somebody else's day-one entry is the reason I felt able to do it at all, and it seems only fair to leave one behind.

What I keep coming back to is how long it took me to get here. Not the medication — the asking. Years of that.

Bread at four.