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How I got a referral moving after nine months

Started 21 March 2026 · 14 replies · 96 hearts · read 1.4k times

ClémenceNantes, FR · 21 March 2026
4 months ago

A question rather than an update: How I got a referral moving after nine months

I have a letter in front of me and I do not know what it actually says.

I have written down what has actually happened, in order, because I find that more useful than my summary of it.

What I would find most useful is not advice. It is somebody describing what their version of this was, and how long it went on for.

I will report back either way, because I have been helped by other people's follow-ups more than by their questions.

32

Birdie BWhitstable, UK
#1

No advice, just recognition. That sounds exhausting and I am sorry you are in it.

8

JuniperMachynlleth, UK
#2

Reading the opening post, I recognised more of that than I expected to.

I keep a two-line diary and it is the only reason I could answer this question about myself. Worth starting even now.

5

PetraFacilitatorMelbourne, Australia
#3

Thank you for writing this. I am not going to add information to it. I am going to say that what you have described is very common and very rarely said out loud.

13me too 2

BridieWexford, IE
#4

The phrase that unlocked my appointment was asking what specifically she wanted me to watch for. It moved us from reassurance to a plan in about thirty seconds.

3

SorrelMachynlleth, UK
#5

the reply above said something I want to sit with for a second.

I am about four months behind you and I have been dreading exactly this, so thank you for writing it down before I got there.

4

BessLouth, UK
#6

Yes to the burping. It is real, it is unbeautiful, and it does settle.

5me too 4

NilsUppsala, SE
#7

Can I gently push back on one thing? Not the substance, just the framing — you have written twice that you should be coping better. Who told you that?

6

LlianCarmarthen, UK
#8

Building on what the reply above wrote rather than answering the original question.

My pharmacist was more use than anyone. Ten minutes at the counter, no appointment, no charge.

7

DelythBala, UK
#9

the reply above — yes, and the bit that took me longest to accept was the next part.

Have you got anyone who can be with you when you do it? It made an enormous difference to me and I felt silly asking.

5

SaffHastings, UK
#10

The thing that changed it for me was going slower, agreed with my prescriber. I am not suggesting you do that. I am saying the conversation exists.

10

IlyaAlmaty, KZ
#11

I did exactly the same and felt terrible about it. You have not done anything wrong.

6

SerenLlandudno, UK
#12

Practical, boring answer: write the three questions down before you go in. I have never once remembered them otherwise.

5

BoazHaarlem, NL
#14

the reply above said something I want to sit with for a second.

Coming back to this a fortnight later to say it settled. Leaving the update because I hate reading threads that stop.

6