Journal
Jonty’s journal
Overthinking it professionally.
Reduced
week 83flat energy 33 replies
A brief account of the week. Nothing happened again. I am aware that is now the fourth month running I have written that, and I have decided it is the best sentence in this…
Starters as a main
week 79loved energy 31 reply
Starters as a main course, permanently. No explanation offered, none requested. A wedding. Three courses I could not face, a table of people who noticed, and a very kind…
A different shape
week 77foggy energy 2
A brief account of the week. Repeat study came back and the apnoea is much reduced. Ten years of that mask. Waking at four again. Not anxious, just awake, lying there…
The question I had been avoiding
week 74heard energy 42 replies
A brief account of the week. Took the diary in. She read it properly, which I had not expected, and changed the plan because of it. She reduced one of my other medications. I…
Sunday lunch
week 71loved energy 31 reply
A brief account of the week. Starters as a main course, permanently. No explanation offered, none requested. A wedding. Three courses I could not face, a table of people who…
No mask
week 69foggy energy 24 replies
Repeat study came back and the apnoea is much reduced. Ten years of that mask. Waking at four again. Not anxious, just awake, lying there listening to the boiler. The sleep…
Before nine
week 66steady energy 43 replies
A brief account of the week. Spread it across the day instead of trying to do it all at teatime and everything got easier. I have found five things I can get down when…
A wedding
week 64awkward energy 41 reply
Starters as a main course, permanently. No explanation offered, none requested. A wedding. Three courses I could not face, a table of people who noticed, and a very kind…
Two lines a day
week 61organised energy 52 replies
A brief account of the week. Batch cooked on a good day for the bad days. Six labelled boxes in the freezer and a great deal of smugness. Two lines a day in a paper diary.…
Paired
week 59held energy 34 replies
Paired up. We text on Sunday nights, four or five lines each, and it has quietly become the most reliable thing in my week. She had a bad week and I had a fine one, and next…
I wanted to stop
week 58stubborn energy 24 replies
Second plateau, and it is easier than the first, mostly because I have been here and come out the other side without doing anything clever. Flat, and he analysed it…
Circle tonight
week 56warm energy 24 replies
Somebody new tonight, terrified, exactly where I was in the spring. I said the thing that had been said to me and watched it land. Went for the practical answers and stayed…
Off the floor
week 54quietly delighted energy 21 reply
A brief account of the week. Got down on the floor and back up again unaided. I have not been able to do that since 2021 and I did it twice more just to check. Tied my own…
Two lengths, badly
week 51grateful energy 41 reply
Tied my own laces standing up. I am aware of how that sounds and I do not care. Carried both bags up in one go. Small thing. Wrote it down. Got down on the floor and back up…
Dreams
week 49foggy energy 34 replies
A brief account of the week. Repeat study came back and the apnoea is much reduced. Ten years of that mask. Waking at four again. Not anxious, just awake, lying there…
Three cool bags and a thermometer
week 46organised energy 1
Two lines a day in a paper diary. Date, and one thing. That is the entire system and it has twice changed a clinical decision. Tested three cool bags against a thermometer…
My mother cooks
week 44warm energy 41 reply
A brief account of the week. Starters as a main course, permanently. No explanation offered, none requested. A wedding. Three courses I could not face, a table of people who…
Off the floor
week 41quietly delighted energy 13 replies
A brief account of the week. Carried both bags up in one go. Small thing. Wrote it down. Got down on the floor and back up again unaided. I have not been able to do that…
Two lengths, badly
week 40pleased energy 24 replies
A brief account of the week. Got down on the floor and back up again unaided. I have not been able to do that since 2021 and I did it twice more just to check. Cycled to…
Awake at four
week 38tired energy 2
Repeat study came back and the apnoea is much reduced. Ten years of that mask. Waking at four again. Not anxious, just awake, lying there listening to the boiler. The sleep…