Journal
Nix’s journal
Neurodivergent. Routine is everything.
Two years, no news
week 83flat energy 3
The strange part is not having a project any more. I had not understood how much I was enjoying having one. Nothing happened again. I am aware that is now the fourth month…
Nothing happened again
week 83settled energy 33 replies
Notes for the week. The strange part is not having a project any more. I had not understood how much I was enjoying having one. Steady. Nothing happened again. I am aware…
The question I had been avoiding
week 81frustrated energy 4
Notes for the week. Nine minutes. I took three written questions and got three answers, which is the best return I have ever had from an appointment. A locum who had clearly…
She noticed first
week 79held energy 1
Notes for the week. She had a bad week and I had a fine one, and next month it will be the other way round. That is the whole mechanism. Nobody has ever asked me how I was…
Fewer, heavier
week 77tired but good energy 12 replies
Grip strength has gone off and I noticed it opening a jar before I noticed it anywhere else. Back to loading properly. Kept the two sessions that matter and dropped the two…
My mother cooks
week 75warm energy 51 reply
Recording this for the record. My mother cooks. That is how she says it. So I eat what I can, slowly, and I say thank you, and we manage. It is not a problem to be solved.…
A plain question
week 73steady energy 43 replies
Was undereating without realising. The nurse asked a plain question about what I had actually eaten in the last two days and I heard my own answer. Protein first, everything…
Stayed for the company
week 71warm energy 5
Notes for the week. Somebody new tonight, terrified, exactly where I was in the spring. I said the thing that had been said to me and watched it land. Went for the practical…
An hour on the floor
week 69quietly delighted energy 11 reply
Notes for the week. Carried both bags up in one go. Small thing. Wrote it down. Swam. First time since school. Two lengths, badly, grinning. Sat on the floor and played for…
Dreams
week 67tired energy 14 replies
Recording this for the record. Vivid dreams, every night, the sort you have to sit up and shake off. Two other people in circle have the same and none of us can find anything…
She stopped the room
week 65warm energy 2
Recording this for the record. The facilitator stopped the room when four of us were talking at once and asked one person how she was actually doing. It changed the whole…
Nothing to report
week 63flat energy 31 reply
No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have taken my medication on the correct day for the eleventh week running. Nothing to report. Writing it down…
Slept through
week 61rested energy 24 replies
Vivid dreams, every night, the sort you have to sit up and shake off. Two other people in circle have the same and none of us can find anything written about it. The sleep…
Flat, whole night
week 59pleased energy 31 reply
Full shift on my feet and my knees did not stop me. That has not happened in about four years. Up the stairs at work twice without stopping at the landing. I stood at the top…
I nearly did not write
week 57fine energy 11 reply
Recording this for the record. Nothing to report. Writing it down anyway, on the theory that a journal made only of eventful weeks would give a false impression of the whole…
Six labelled boxes
week 55organised energy 22 replies
Recording this for the record. Tested three cool bags against a thermometer this weekend because I am that person. Results written up for the travel circle. Small logistics…
An hour on the floor
week 54quietly delighted energy 14 replies
Recording this for the record. Walked into town and back, which I stopped doing years ago without ever deciding to stop. Walked the Water of Leith path end to end. Carried…
Eight minutes and a chair
week 53tired but good energy 12 replies
Notes for the week. Kept the two sessions that matter and dropped the two that were vanity. Fewer, heavier, done. Came back after a bad fortnight without trying to make up…
Quiet
week 51fine energy 23 replies
No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have taken my medication on the correct day for the eleventh week running. Nothing to report. Writing it down…
Nothing to report
week 49steady energy 51 reply
Nothing to report. Writing it down anyway, on the theory that a journal made only of eventful weeks would give a false impression of the whole thing. No news. The dog is…