Journal
Soraya’s journal
Access is complicated here. Grateful for this room.
My mother cooks
week 29loved energy 51 reply
A quiet week. Sunday lunch at my grandmother's. Small plate, long afternoon, no drama, and she was happy. Somebody asked what my secret was and I froze completely. Still…
An unremarkable week
week 28flat energy 11 reply
Late, and writing anyway. No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have taken my medication on the correct day for the eleventh week running. Nothing to…
Two lines a day
week 27pleased energy 23 replies
Short one tonight. Two lines a day in a paper diary. Date, and one thing. That is the entire system and it has twice changed a clinical decision. Started translating the…
No mask
week 27tired energy 14 replies
Repeat study came back and the apnoea is much reduced. Ten years of that mask. Vivid dreams, every night, the sort you have to sit up and shake off. Two other people in…
Sunday night, four lines
week 25held energy 34 replies
My buddy noticed something in my journal before I did and asked me a very gentle question about it. Paired up. We text on Sunday nights, four or five lines each, and it has…
Starters as a main
week 24loved energy 11 reply
Short one tonight. Sunday lunch at my grandmother's. Small plate, long afternoon, no drama, and she was happy. Somebody asked what my secret was and I froze completely. Still…
Paired
week 23held energy 34 replies
A quiet week. Nobody has ever asked me how I was doing on a Wednesday before. My buddy noticed something in my journal before I did and asked me a very gentle question about…
Quiet
week 22fine energy 23 replies
Short one tonight. Nothing to report. Writing it down anyway, on the theory that a journal made only of eventful weeks would give a false impression of the whole thing. No…
Protein first
week 21steady energy 33 replies
Short one tonight. I have found five things I can get down when nothing appeals and I have written them on the fridge. That list is the most useful thing I own. Got something…
She noticed first
week 20held energy 14 replies
She had a bad week and I had a fine one, and next month it will be the other way round. That is the whole mechanism. Nobody has ever asked me how I was doing on a Wednesday…
She read the diary
week 18heard energy 32 replies
Late, and writing anyway. Asked the question I had been avoiding for eleven years. She answered it in about ninety seconds and was completely unbothered. A locum who had…
Two flights of stairs
week 17quietly delighted energy 51 reply
A quiet week. Sat on the floor and played for an hour, and then got up. That was the entire reason I started, and I have now done it. Carried both bags up in one go. Small…
Stayed for the company
week 16warm energy 2
The facilitator stopped the room when four of us were talking at once and asked one person how she was actually doing. It changed the whole hour. Circle tonight. Eight of us,…
Where the pen lives
week 15organised energy 12 replies
Late, and writing anyway. New sharps bin, and a plan for what happens to it when I move in September. Tested three cool bags against a thermometer this weekend because I am…
Unpleasant, not dangerous
week 13sore energy 23 replies
Short one tonight. Cramp in both calves in the night, twice this week. Mentioned it and had bloods done rather than being told to eat a banana, which I appreciated. The…
No news
week 12fine energy 53 replies
No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have taken my medication on the correct day for the eleventh week running. Nothing to report. Writing it down…
A rough few days
week 11rough energy 54 replies
Cramp in both calves in the night, twice this week. Mentioned it and had bloods done rather than being told to eat a banana, which I appreciated. Mild, and she wrote about…
A plain question
week 10steady energy 43 replies
Short one tonight. Got something with protein in before nine this morning, which meant the rest of the day did not fall apart at four. Protein first, everything else after.…
Both bags, one go
week 9quietly delighted energy 21 reply
Late, and writing anyway. Tied my own laces standing up. I am aware of how that sounds and I do not care. Swam. First time since school. Two lengths, badly, grinning. Walked…
Two flights of stairs
week 8pleased energy 51 reply
Short one tonight. Full shift on my feet and my knees did not stop me. That has not happened in about four years. Sat on the floor and played for an hour, and then got up.…