Journal
Cato’s journal
Blunt, kind, occasionally both at once.
Sunday night, four lines
week 24held energy 44 replies
Nobody has ever asked me how I was doing on a Wednesday before. Paired up. We text on Sunday nights, four or five lines each, and it has quietly become the most reliable…
Steady
week 23steady energy 41 reply
Steady. That is the whole entry. No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have taken my medication on the correct day for the eleventh week running. Done…
Six labelled boxes
week 22organised energy 12 replies
This week: Batch cooked on a good day for the bad days. Six labelled boxes in the freezer and a great deal of smugness. New sharps bin, and a plan for what happens to it when…
Quiet
week 21flat energy 33 replies
This week: No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have taken my medication on the correct day for the eleventh week running. An unremarkable week. Ate,…
Steady
week 20steady energy 51 reply
An unremarkable week. Ate, walked, worked, slept adequately. This is what most of it looks like. Steady. That is the whole entry. Done talking.
Circle tonight
week 19warm energy 34 replies
This week: Somebody new tonight, terrified, exactly where I was in the spring. I said the thing that had been said to me and watched it land. The facilitator stopped the room…
Laces
week 18pleased energy 21 reply
Tied my own laces standing up. I am aware of how that sounds and I do not care. Up the stairs at work twice without stopping at the landing. I stood at the top for a second…
Back without making it up
week 17tired but good energy 32 replies
This week: Grip strength has gone off and I noticed it opening a jar before I noticed it anywhere else. Back to loading properly. Kept the two sessions that matter and…
Somebody new
week 16warm energy 14 replies
Went for the practical answers and stayed for the company, which I gather is what everybody does. Somebody new tonight, terrified, exactly where I was in the spring. I said…
Not writing about this would be dishonest
week 15sore energy 24 replies
The nausea has a shape to it now. Thursday teatime it starts, Friday it peaks, Saturday afternoon it lifts. Once I could see the pattern it stopped feeling like something…
Propped up on pillows
week 14flat energy 5
This week: Bad week and I am writing it down anyway, because a journal that only contains the good weeks would be a lie and no use to anybody reading it later. The burping.…
The pattern of it
week 13sore energy 11 reply
This week: The nausea has a shape to it now. Thursday teatime it starts, Friday it peaks, Saturday afternoon it lifts. Once I could see the pattern it stopped feeling like…
A rough few days
week 12rough energy 11 reply
Bad week and I am writing it down anyway, because a journal that only contains the good weeks would be a lie and no use to anybody reading it later. Two sentences. The…
She reduced it
week 12frustrated energy 22 replies
This week: She reduced one of my other medications. I asked her twice whether that was really allowed. Nine minutes. I took three written questions and got three answers,…
Quiet
week 11fine energy 13 replies
This week: Steady. That is the whole entry. No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have taken my medication on the correct day for the eleventh week…
An hour on the floor
week 10pleased energy 21 reply
This week: Sat on the floor and played for an hour, and then got up. That was the entire reason I started, and I have now done it. Full shift on my feet and my knees did not…
Steady
week 9steady energy 31 reply
No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have taken my medication on the correct day for the eleventh week running. An unremarkable week. Ate, walked,…
Paired
week 8held energy 54 replies
This week: Paired up. We text on Sunday nights, four or five lines each, and it has quietly become the most reliable thing in my week. Nobody has ever asked me how I was…
Quiet
week 8steady energy 33 replies
This week: An unremarkable week. Ate, walked, worked, slept adequately. This is what most of it looks like. Steady. That is the whole entry. Done talking.
A plain question
week 7steady energy 33 replies
Was undereating without realising. The nurse asked a plain question about what I had actually eaten in the last two days and I heard my own answer. Got something with protein…