Journal
Patrick’s journal
Pacing myself for the first time in my life.
Slept through
week 53foggy energy 3
A quiet week. Waking at four again. Not anxious, just awake, lying there listening to the boiler. The sleep has changed shape rather than improved. Different, not better, and…
An unremarkable week
week 50fine energy 23 replies
A quiet week. No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have taken my medication on the correct day for the eleventh week running. Quiet. Injection Tuesday,…
Somebody new
week 48warm energy 54 replies
Late, and writing anyway. Somebody new tonight, terrified, exactly where I was in the spring. I said the thing that had been said to me and watched it land. The facilitator…
Quiet
week 45fine energy 23 replies
Late, and writing anyway. Quiet. Injection Tuesday, mild Wednesday, fine by Thursday, and then a normal weekend. An unremarkable week. Ate, walked, worked, slept adequately.…
No news
week 43steady energy 41 reply
A quiet week. An unremarkable week. Ate, walked, worked, slept adequately. This is what most of it looks like. Nothing to report. Writing it down anyway, on the theory that a…
A printout I cannot read
week 42heard energy 51 reply
A quiet week. A locum who had clearly read nothing. I was polite, I got what I needed, and I have booked with my own GP for next month. Blood pressure medication reduced.…
Paired
week 40held energy 44 replies
Paired up. We text on Sunday nights, four or five lines each, and it has quietly become the most reliable thing in my week. She had a bad week and I had a fine one, and next…
Laces
week 37grateful energy 11 reply
A quiet week. Full shift on my feet and my knees did not stop me. That has not happened in about four years. Got down on the floor and back up again unaided. I have not been…
She read the diary
week 35brisk energy 22 replies
Short one tonight. Took the diary in. She read it properly, which I had not expected, and changed the plan because of it. A locum who had clearly read nothing. I was polite,…
A different shape
week 33rested energy 24 replies
Waking at four again. Not anxious, just awake, lying there listening to the boiler. The sleep has changed shape rather than improved. Different, not better, and I cannot yet…
Eight minutes and a chair
week 30tired but good energy 32 replies
A quiet week. Kept the two sessions that matter and dropped the two that were vanity. Fewer, heavier, done. Came back after a bad fortnight without trying to make up the lost…
I nearly did not write
week 28fine energy 13 replies
Short one tonight. Nothing to report. Writing it down anyway, on the theory that a journal made only of eventful weeks would give a false impression of the whole thing.…
An hour on the floor
week 25quietly delighted energy 21 reply
A quiet week. Tied my own laces standing up. I am aware of how that sounds and I do not care. Walked the Great Southern Trail at the weekend for a month. Up the stairs at…
Where the pen lives
week 22organised energy 42 replies
A quiet week. Anchored injection day to my shift pattern rather than to the calendar, which solved a problem I had been feeling guilty about for four months. Batch cooked on…
Stayed for the company
week 19warm energy 44 replies
A quiet week. Went for the practical answers and stayed for the company, which I gather is what everybody does. Somebody new tonight, terrified, exactly where I was in the…
Two lengths, badly
week 16quietly delighted energy 31 reply
Short one tonight. Sat on the floor and played for an hour, and then got up. That was the entire reason I started, and I have now done it. Full shift on my feet and my knees…
Circle tonight
week 14warm energy 54 replies
Circle tonight. Eight of us, an hour, and about eleven minutes of actual information. The rest was the point. Went for the practical answers and stayed for the company, which…
Not writing about this would be dishonest
week 12sore energy 33 replies
A quiet week. Bad week and I am writing it down anyway, because a journal that only contains the good weeks would be a lie and no use to anybody reading it later. A rough…
She reduced it
week 11brisk energy 42 replies
Late, and writing anyway. A locum who had clearly read nothing. I was polite, I got what I needed, and I have booked with my own GP for next month. Took the diary in. She…
Two sessions
week 8tired but good energy 22 replies
Late, and writing anyway. Came back after a bad fortnight without trying to make up the lost ground, which is the thing that used to end it for me every time. Walked instead…