Journal
Hattie’s journal
Chronic fatigue plus this. Careful pacing.
The limits of yoghurt
week 32steady energy 13 replies
Short one tonight. Greek yoghurt, eggs, and the limits of both. I have reached the limits of both. I have found five things I can get down when nothing appeals and I have…
An unremarkable week
week 30flat energy 21 reply
An unremarkable week. Ate, walked, worked, slept adequately. This is what most of it looks like. Quiet. Injection Tuesday, mild Wednesday, fine by Thursday, and then a normal…
A wedding
week 29awkward energy 41 reply
A quiet week. Starters as a main course, permanently. No explanation offered, none requested. My mother cooks. That is how she says it. So I eat what I can, slowly, and I say…
What is your secret
week 28awkward energy 31 reply
Short one tonight. Starters as a main course, permanently. No explanation offered, none requested. My mother cooks. That is how she says it. So I eat what I can, slowly, and…
Grip
week 27tired but good energy 42 replies
Grip strength has gone off and I noticed it opening a jar before I noticed it anywhere else. Back to loading properly. Eight minutes and a chair. That is the whole programme.…
A new bin and a plan
week 25organised energy 32 replies
Late, and writing anyway. Anchored injection day to my shift pattern rather than to the calendar, which solved a problem I had been feeling guilty about for four months.…
Fewer, heavier
week 23tired but good energy 1
Late, and writing anyway. Eight minutes and a chair. That is the whole programme. Tuesday and Friday. I have done it for eleven weeks. Two sessions this week, both short,…
Back without making it up
week 22tired but good energy 32 replies
Short one tonight. Two sessions this week, both short, both done. Ren keeps saying that two a week for two years beats a perfect programme abandoned in March, and he is…
Both bags, one go
week 21grateful energy 51 reply
Short one tonight. Walked into town and back, which I stopped doing years ago without ever deciding to stop. Sat on the floor and played for an hour, and then got up. That…
I nearly did not write
week 20flat energy 51 reply
Short one tonight. Quiet. Injection Tuesday, mild Wednesday, fine by Thursday, and then a normal weekend. No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have…
The third day
week 18wary energy 1
Short one tonight. Stepped up this week. Everyone in circle says the fortnight after a change is the honest one, so I am not drawing any conclusions yet. I have been at the…
Holding here
week 17wary energy 24 replies
I have been at the same step for five months and every clinician I meet seems mildly surprised. It is working. I am not moving. Slowed the schedule right down. Went back down…
Before nine
week 16steady energy 43 replies
Short one tonight. I have found five things I can get down when nothing appeals and I have written them on the fridge. That list is the most useful thing I own. Protein…
Nine minutes
week 15frustrated energy 52 replies
Asked the question I had been avoiding for eleven years. She answered it in about ninety seconds and was completely unbothered. Nine minutes. I took three written questions…
Walking
week 14tired but good energy 1
Late, and writing anyway. Walked instead of the bus all week. Not a programme. Just walking. Came back after a bad fortnight without trying to make up the lost ground, which…
Sore and slow
week 13sore energy 22 replies
Late, and writing anyway. The burping. Nobody mentions the burping. It is not in any leaflet and it is genuinely one of the odder experiences of my adult life. A crash after…
An unremarkable week
week 13steady energy 43 replies
No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have taken my medication on the correct day for the eleventh week running. I nearly did not write this week because…
I nearly did not write
week 11flat energy 13 replies
A quiet week. I nearly did not write this week because there was nothing in it. Then I thought about how much I have got out of other people's boring weeks. Steady. That is…
Stayed for the company
week 10warm energy 1
The facilitator stopped the room when four of us were talking at once and asked one person how she was actually doing. It changed the whole hour. Somebody new tonight,…
The question I had been avoiding
week 9frustrated energy 52 replies
Nine minutes. I took three written questions and got three answers, which is the best return I have ever had from an appointment. Took the diary in. She read it properly,…