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Journal

Col’s journal

Living in a van. Cold chain is a genuine puzzle.

46 entries from 27 Aug 2024 to 5 May 2026 · Newquay, UK

  • No project

    Tuesday 5 May 2026week 89content energy 32 replies

    Quickly, before bed. Reduced to a maintenance dose. Same day, same fridge, less of it. Steady. The strange part is not having a project any more. I had not understood how…

  • Slept through

    Thursday 12 Mar 2026week 81rested energy 54 replies

    Ten minutes then I am asleep. Waking at four again. Not anxious, just awake, lying there listening to the boiler. Slept through. Whole night, no waking. It has been so long…

  • I nearly did not write

    Friday 27 Feb 2026week 79steady energy 51 reply

    Quickly, before bed. I nearly did not write this week because there was nothing in it. Then I thought about how much I have got out of other people's boring weeks. No news.…

  • How are you doing on a Wednesday

    Sunday 15 Feb 2026week 77held energy 4

    Quickly, before bed. My buddy noticed something in my journal before I did and asked me a very gentle question about it. She had a bad week and I had a fine one, and next…

  • Two flights of stairs

    Sunday 1 Feb 2026week 75pleased energy 51 reply

    Quickly, before bed. Sat on the floor and played for an hour, and then got up. That was the entire reason I started, and I have now done it. Carried both bags up in one go.…

  • Pausing

    Friday 16 Jan 2026week 73pinched energy 22 replies

    Quickly, before bed. Did the arithmetic out loud, on the page, no rounding. It is a lot. Seeing it written down was steadying rather than frightening, which I had not…

  • The arithmetic

    Friday 9 Jan 2026week 72pinched energy 42 replies

    Quickly, before bed. Did the arithmetic out loud, on the page, no rounding. It is a lot. Seeing it written down was steadying rather than frightening, which I had not…

  • She noticed first

    Wednesday 31 Dec 2025week 71held energy 4

    Ten minutes then I am asleep. She had a bad week and I had a fine one, and next month it will be the other way round. That is the whole mechanism. My buddy noticed something…

  • The list on the fridge

    Tuesday 16 Dec 2025week 69steady energy 43 replies

    Quickly, before bed. Greek yoghurt, eggs, and the limits of both. I have reached the limits of both. I have found five things I can get down when nothing appeals and I have…

  • Awake at four

    Thursday 4 Dec 2025week 67tired energy 5

    Waking at four again. Not anxious, just awake, lying there listening to the boiler. Slept through. Whole night, no waking. It has been so long that I lay there in the morning…

  • Quiet

    Saturday 22 Nov 2025week 65flat energy 53 replies

    Quickly, before bed. No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have taken my medication on the correct day for the eleventh week running. Quiet. Injection…

  • Nothing to report

    Saturday 8 Nov 2025week 63fine energy 33 replies

    Quickly, before bed. Quiet. Injection Tuesday, mild Wednesday, fine by Thursday, and then a normal weekend. An unremarkable week. Ate, walked, worked, slept adequately. This…

  • I nearly did not write

    Saturday 25 Oct 2025week 61steady energy 33 replies

    An unremarkable week. Ate, walked, worked, slept adequately. This is what most of it looks like. Nothing to report. Writing it down anyway, on the theory that a journal made…

  • Quiet

    Sunday 12 Oct 2025week 59fine energy 31 reply

    Nothing to report. Writing it down anyway, on the theory that a journal made only of eventful weeks would give a false impression of the whole thing. Steady. That is the…

  • She stopped the room

    Friday 26 Sep 2025week 57warm energy 54 replies

    Ten minutes then I am asleep. Went for the practical answers and stayed for the company, which I gather is what everybody does. Somebody new tonight, terrified, exactly where…

  • Nothing to report

    Friday 12 Sep 2025week 55flat energy 53 replies

    Quickly, before bed. Steady. That is the whole entry. I nearly did not write this week because there was nothing in it. Then I thought about how much I have got out of other…

  • Sunday lunch

    Sunday 31 Aug 2025week 53loved energy 51 reply

    Quickly, before bed. Somebody asked what my secret was and I froze completely. Still working out what I want to say to that. A wedding. Three courses I could not face, a…

  • I nearly did not write

    Sunday 17 Aug 2025week 51fine energy 51 reply

    Quickly, before bed. I nearly did not write this week because there was nothing in it. Then I thought about how much I have got out of other people's boring weeks. No news.…

  • Quiet

    Monday 4 Aug 2025week 49flat energy 41 reply

    No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have taken my medication on the correct day for the eleventh week running. Quiet. Injection Tuesday, mild…

  • Before nine

    Monday 21 Jul 2025week 47steady energy 53 replies

    I have found five things I can get down when nothing appeals and I have written them on the fridge. That list is the most useful thing I own. Protein first, everything else…